Real Life Part 2

Warning: This post goes into religion land so if that's not your cup of tea I won't be offended if you don't read it :)

It's no secret that the best half and I are getting married in the very near future.   I've been waiting for this day for years, have been practically shouting it since the day we got engaged, and now that it's upon us I sit with such a heavy heart, but not about the wedding or about getting married. I can't wait to be married.  CANNOT WAIT. 

However,

in the last 96 hours the government shut down, which means our house is down to one income until the mess is resolved.  I've been forced to confront conflict over wedding related services we've paid for and were not receiving and I hate conflict.  

Then, this morning we learned that a member of our fire family, and one of Aaron's co-workers, lost their life.  This suddenly knocked the aforementioned down pretty far on my list of concerns.  Aaron and my brother have a story about this co-worker and one of his first times practicing driving the engine on a fire.  Every time my brother tells this story he laughs so hard he cries and his laugh is infectious.  That's the kind of joy this particular individual brought to lives.  The numbers just keep growing and the loss the fire community has felt in the last six months is something I'd never wish upon anyone. This is what makes my heart heavy.  

{Courtesy of an un-sourced Pin}

I've learned that times like these are designed to make us question our faith, to ask why. When in reality, after we make it through these times our faith is only strengthened. As I was driving home yesterday I looked into my rearview mirror to change lanes and saw the sun shining through the clouds casting bright rays on the earth. It was as if God was telling me not to give up.  He was reminding me that He's still there and He's still working for me and for everyone.  My second reminder of the year if you're keeping track.  As heavy as my heart was today, I focused on this memory for comfort.

We all grieve in different ways and I guess my way is to write, so thank you all for allowing me to do that.  Although today was sad, I'm incredibly excited for the days to come and am grateful for the reminder that the little things are just that, little things.  Hug the ones you love and don't fret the little things because when life happens, you might not get that chance.